We now welcome Florida coach Ron Zook to the podium. Any initial remarks, coach Zook?
"I think probably one of the things that has impressed me the most about being at the University of Florida is the attitude our players have taken obviously every time you get change people resist change and one of the reasons I really believe the transistion has gone as smoothly as it has is because our players have bought into every thing we asked them to do there could have been a lot of them saying we won a lot of games doing it this way but we haven't heard any of that they've tried to do everything we've asked them to do and worked extremely hard obviously when you're putting in a new offense a new defense and new special teams they have a tendency sometimes to put the brakes on and these guys haven't done that they've been a pleasure to work with I think the players like our coaching staff we're very excited to get started this is the time of the year when everyone obviously is anticipating big things and they're anticipating things about their football team and obviously there's a lot of questions about the University of Florida right now and to be honest with you we kind of like that and we're excited to get going as well so that's kind of where we're at right now and obviously if there are any questions out there we'll answer them."
Whew.
Two hundred thirty-four words in 65 seconds.
We now know why Florida athletic director Jeremy Foley chose Zook for the job after Bob Stoops and Mike Shanahan turned him down.
If he couldn't get the best coach out there, he was darn sure going to get the fastest one.
Zook was formally introduced to the SEC media Wednesday and the guy wasn't lying when he said he operates at a different tempo.
As in, warp.
At everything.
Starting with walking and talking.
Spurrier was always a threat to throw a visor. Zook is always a threat to throw a larynx.
His buddies call him "Hyper." He really believes that sleeping four hoursrealfast is the same as sleeping eight hours.
Not long after Zook was hired, he stuck his head in Foley's office.
"You need to get me a cell phone that works in the shower," he said. "That'll give me 10 more minutes to recruit."
The question, of course, is whether this breakneck pace is going to do anything but hasten Zook's way out the door.
The answer: Doubtful.
The history just isn't great, for starters. Ask Hunk Anderson.
What's that, you say? Who is Hunk Anderson?
Exactly.
He's the coach who replaced Knute Rockne.
And there's more where he came from. Ray Perkins followed Bear Bryant, Ray Goff followed Vince Dooley, Earle Bruce followed Woody Hayes and Gary Gibbs followed Barry Switzer.
Right out the door, they followed them.
Beyond all that, Zook - who coached defense under Spurrier before moving on to the NFL - seems not to have learned much from the master.
Spurrier understood that the game is not that complicated. It's not about having the thickest playbook or the biggest cell phone bill. It's about scoring more points than the other guy.
And treating people like men. That's important, too. Spurrier never liked athletic dorms, for instance. He liked the idea of players who understood how to behave no matter where they lived.
Zook is exactly the opposite. He doesn't even let people sit down at practice. Not coaches, not players, not the 65-year-old fan who has been bringing her lawn chair to Gator practices for decades.
"It's something Gunther Cunningham did," said Zook, by way of explanation.
Gunther Cunningham?
None of this is to wish the guy ill, mind you. He seems nice enough. He's an extraordinary worker. But it's not always how hard you work, but how sensible you are about it.
This past spring, the fire alarm went off in the Florida football offices. Everyone calmly filed out of the building. Except the head coach, naturally. He stayed in his second-floor office, working.
"If there really had been a fire, I could have escaped," he told the Orlando Sentinel. "It's not that far of a jump."
Yeah, well, maybe not.
But the landing could really be painful.
Contact columnist Geoff Calkins at 529-2364; E-mail: calkins@gomemphis.com
